**sigh**

Sometimes I feel that I'm broken.  Not internally, not externally, and yet both.  Not emotionally or mentally, and yet both.  I think we all feel that way from time to time, maybe that's just a hope that I'm not "going crazy" and I'm a bit more like the people I interact with than I might otherwise give myself credit for.

Finding a job is difficult.  So bloody difficult.  When I completed my AAS in Photography I realized my school was going to extend the 4 years I'd already spent into an 8 year program for my 4 year BS degree.  When that reality kicked in I withdrew from classes, finished my internship and was applying for jobs near and far.  In the county, in the state, in the country, shoot if I thought I could land the job within my focus of practice I was applying for it.

I applied for jobs from February through May, it was in May 2009 that I decided to instead join the Navy.  I joined in the Delayed Entry Program (or DEP) and was scheduled for leave for bootcamp in April 2010 as a Corpsman (helps doctors, nurses and dentists).  I have no interest in the medical field but it was a shoe-in so when a different job opened up I could get into that job and leave for bootcamp more quickly because I'd already joined.

October First 2009 and the new fiscal year started, new openings popped up and I was able to be changed over to Operations Specialist (watches a RADAR screen, talks to ships, talks to air craft, directs boats, directs air craft, directs ships, operates computers), it wasn't my dream job but it was a job where I new I'd succeed, I'd earn rank quickly and with any luck within the first 2 or 3 years of my 4 year active-duty contract I'd be able to switch to MC (ie Mass Communications Specialist, ie Photographer).

In November 2012 the reality sunk in, I was denied (again) the option to convert to MC.  I was an OS2 (Operations Specialist E5), my year group was undermanned and almost every year group in the MC family was over-loaded.  They were kicking people out of the MC rating and I was the lonely sucker who kept trying to get into it and kept getting told no.

At this point I'd had knee surgery earlier in June 2012, re-tore the meniscus in the same knee in September 2012 and knew I was going to need another surgery in the early part of 2013.  I also had knee pain in the other knee, but it wasn't something the Navy was willing to check on until my worse knee was better.  Why give you 6 weeks down time when you can spread it out and let the not-so-bad knee get worse, right?  That's the logic they use.

I chose to give back my quota.  Seal the deal that there was no chance in heaven or on earth that I could stay active duty in the US Navy.  I did feel a bit pressured to make that decision, and by a bit I mean I had almost every leader and supervisor E7-O5 asking me several times a day if I was staying in or getting out.  "no pressure".

I chose to get out.  I sealed the deal.  Not knowing if there would be a job for me when I got out.  Knowing I'd probably not have my less-bad-knee operated on before the end of my contract and that I'd have to wait for the VA (Department of Veterans Affairs) to handle the issue.  I had a wife and a daughter at the time.  Before I got out my wife was pregnant (in our defense, she's had an internal issue which before our daughter had been preventing her from getting pregnant...apparently that issue isn't affecting her ability to get pregnant any more...as we found out).

In March 2013 my bad knee had knee surgery again, in October 2013 I was then seen for my less-bad-knee and an MRI confirmed a torn meniscus.  My wife, our daughter and I moved back home, moved in with my parents, confident that I'd be gainfully employed within the coming month.  Since I was taking almost a month of leave (paid vacation) we felt the move-in was quite temporary.

The government shut down and the push for Obamacare being funded I found had a grave impact on jobs.  The combination of those two factors put jobs, in the grave.  From November 2012 to November 2013 I watched jobs in California, Utah and Texas start to shrivel like grapes in the sun in death valley CA.  Still confident there was a reason which had lead my family back home to Utah every time I was called by the reserve Navy recruiters who had openings for MC's I felt directed to turn them down.

From October 10th until February 14th I'd had a phone interview with Xactware, an in-person interview with Ken Garff (as a vehicle photographer) and Two interviews with Rocky Mountain ATV/MC (where I interviewed to be their Director of Photography but was informed via mail today February 14th 2014 that they selected another candidate).  More than 20 jobs applied for every month for four months.  Three kind-of-prospects from it.  Let's not discount the fact that I'd actually started applying for jobs in November 2012, noting that I wasn't available until Oct-Nov 2013.

The most hope we've had in 4 months was RM ATV/MC.  They were great interviews.  I felt, and still feel, that I could have filled their needs quite well, I'd like to believe they felt that way as well considering they had me back for a second interview and hired their prime-candidate off of the second interview.  Still, there's something out there, a reason we're back in Utah, a purpose to fulfill here.

There's a job here somewhere.  It has benefits, a 401k and health insurance.  Most days it feels like I'm digging for the needle in the haystack.  Our savings from my military earnings have almost run dry, unemployment doesn't cover our bills but is "too much" to allow us to qualify for medicare/medicaid.  My wife is due with our second child in just about one month (note that she also delivered around two weeks early with our first child) oh and did I mention that the knee injury in the not-so-bad knee is adequate enough to make it so I can't lift heavy weight every day, or stay on my feet all day, or stay sitting all day?  The only job-type that will really work for my knee in its current condition is one where I can stand, sit, move around, be active but not heavy lifting (like when I was a CNC Press Brake Operator for 2 years with TriStar Manufacturing, prior to my internship at UVU).

Photography is the ideal job for my knees.  I can wear knee pads for when I need to kneel (also acts as a pseudo-knee brace I've found), I sit for processing, I stand and walk around for getting the images.  My equipment that's heavy is small, my equipment that's large isn't too heavy and I can roll it around as needed.  Sadly, there just aren't jobs out there for it right now.

Some companies believe that it's cheaper to hire-out to photographers, then they end up spending 30,000 - 60,000 on photographs every year and have inconsistent quality from the images because they're using different photographers each time, different gear is being used and it's not showing a consistent quality for the company.  Ken Garff figured that issue out and in the last year and a half has hired 10 full-time photographers.  They've set a trend which other car dealerships are struggling to match.  Eventually, perhaps, they might cave and move toward a logical choice.

In the mean time, there's a photographer with experience in Studio, Location, Event, Sports, Editorial, Photojournalism and a half dozen other niches in the photographic realm who remains for hire.  Based in Salem, Utah.  Eagerly searching for the company who will choose him as their best candidate.

Starts with a sigh, ends with a focused vector.

Here's a preview of my profile that's available on www.thumbtack.com There you can sort through services available from vendors of all sorts. You can see reviews from customers, the vendor's portfolio and their responses to various questions there from thumbtack.com. Here's a link to my portfolio there.

PC Photo

by PC Photo

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Coverage

Sometimes in order to be recognized, gain credibility, be noticed, increase coverage, be noticed...

 Photo Contests must be entered.

 Today is no different.

Visit FindYourArtSchool to see my photo submission and easily find over 400 good interior design schools and more!

I hate to add something about politics

Below is a response to a letter I received from Susan A. Davis, she's currently serving as the local representative for district 53 in California.  She's a democrat, and by and large I feel her response letter to me stated "I don't care what your concerns or desires are, I'm the elected official representing you and I'm going to put ink to paper for whatever the hell I want to despite you not agreeing with it".  This is just one more reason why I don't vote for democrats at this time in my life, and why I hate the state of California.  A state is no better than the politicians and laws that it embraces.  Without any further adieu, below is my response, and her letter that I'm responding to is at the very bottom of my text.  You'll know the difference when the font changes.

My wife is a social worker too.  Getting "deadliest weapons" out of our neighborhoods?  The deadliest weapons aren't legal without an FFL (or higher) license.  If you think a 30-round magazine is in the category of "deadliest weapons" or a 5.56 or 7.62 round is in the family of "deadliest weapons" then clearly you need to understand what the deadliest weapons really are.  A nuclear bomb is in the family of deadliest weapons.  A Gauss cannon is in the family of deadliest weapons.  An M1 Abrams tank is in the family of deadliest weapons.

A 10-30 round magazine in a semi-automatic pistol or rifle is NOT in the family of deadliest weapons.  Where's your perspective?  Have you been around any of the deadliest weapons when they've been in use?  Can you compare that from your own personal experience to the weapons the "gun control advocates" are trying to limit?  By some "descriptions" my 1940 Mosin Nagant is considered an Assault Rifle.  Simply because it has a bayonet mount, as all military personnel rifles do (yes, even the M16 and M4 have a bayonet mount).  It's a 5-round (built in magazine), bolt-action rifle.  It's not even semi-automatic because it doesn't cycle its next round into the chamber.  Yet because it has a mount for a bayonet it's being considered an Assault Rifle by some states proposed policies.

The deadliest weapon I can think of in the United States, is a pen and paper in the hands of an elected official making decisions based on fear.  Don't disarm us.

Your letter proves to me why I didn't vote for you.  It proves to me why I won't and cannot vote for you with any good conscience.  

Hopefully you change your mind and do NOT vote AGAINST the second amendment.  Guns are not the enemy, and a public which has the ability to defend itself is not the enemy.  More thorough background checks might help in very rare instances.  In most instances its a lack of preparation on the part of the location where guns were brought on board by a bad person, or lack of leg-work done by law enforcement personnel.  If a bad person wants to do a bad thing there's no ink on paper that will prevent them from doing it, disarming the neighbors who could help prevent the issue from being it's absolute worst is a foolish plan.

A house alarm makes a house less likely to be broken into.  Not because the house alarm shoots at the robber, but because the alarm brings unwanted attention to the house, which makes it a "hardened target" in the eyes of the potential thief.  Allowing people to be armed doesn't mean they're walking around with a round in the chamber, it's more equivalent to installing a house alarm into a home.   Knowledge that the house COULD HAVE an "alarm" can be a deterrent in most cases.  

Consider the fact of Illinois which when they made it impossible for people to have concealed carry permits the amount of gun violence within the state shot through the roof, to numbers beyond what they were during the days of Al Capone.  Disarming the public sure must have helped, because making guns illegal surely make it a safer place.  Especially knowing police forces are underpaid, which makes them a prime target to be bribed.  So in states with limited gun permits we now have underpaid people as the only option for keeping the general public safe, and if any of those people are bought off we now have ZERO protection for ourselves when we're outside of our homes.  

Did you know as a photographer I frequently carry over $15,000 in camera gear on my person?  Did you know in California you can only have a concealed carry permit if you're a security guard, transporting a large value of diamonds, or if you have an FFL License (which to obtain an FFL license you must be in the trade of buying and selling guns).  Which means when I'm out photographing anything if I'm identified as being worth someone's time all of my gear could be taken from me at gun point and I would have no protection from the thief.  Because the thief knows I'm disarmed, because the state requires it unless you're in one of the careers I mentioned above.  How would that make YOU feel?  Knowing you're carrying a large amount of money in gear on you, and that it's easily identified as being high-value, and that you're completely disarmed because of the arrogance and ignorance of a person sitting behind a desk with a pen and piece of paper.

No, I'm sure you don't get it.  It's hard to from the other side of the desk.

---

From: Congresswoman Susan Davis
To: Mr. Paul Crown
Sent: Wednesday, April 17, 2013 1:25 PM
Subject: Getting back to you

SUSAN A. DAVIS 53rd DISTRICT, CALIFORNIA WASHINGTON OFFICE: 1526 LONGWORTH HOB WASHINGTON, DC 20515 (202) 225-2040 SAN DIEGO OFFICE: 2700 ADAMS AVENUE, SUITE 102 SAN DIEGO, CA 92116 (619) 280-5353 COMMITTEES: ARMED SERVICES SUBCOMMITTEES: MILITARY PERSONNEL, RANKING MEMBER INTELLIGENCE, EMERGING THREATS & CAPABILITIES EDUCATION AND THE WORKFORCE SUBCOMMITTEES: EARLY CHILDHOOD, ELEMENTARY AND SECONDARY EDUCATION HIGHER EDUCATION AND WORKFORCE TRAINING April 17, 2013 Mr. Paul Crown 6010 Rock Island Rd San Diego, CA 92139-1030 Dear Paul, Thank you for writing with your thoughts about gun control. I appreciate hearing from you and apologize for the delay in my response. Each week, I receive over 2,000 pieces of mail, and it often takes me longer to respond than I would like. First, I would like to thank you for your courageous service to your country. As a Ranking Member of the Military Personnel Subcommittee, I have been a consistent advocate for our brave men and women in uniform. I would also like to assure you that I have always respected the Second Amendment right of law-abiding citizens to own guns. Americans who observe the law should be allowed to own firearms legally and without harassment. At the same time, I'm haunted by the events that took place in Newtown, Connecticut, and I believe that a national effort is necessary to ensure that tragedies like this do not happen again. I believe we can honor the Second Amendment while keeping the deadliest weapons out of our neighborhoods. As a former mental health social worker, I think it's imperative that we make it easier to get treatment for mental illnesses. We need to review our current background check process to ensure that guns are kept out of the wrong hands. I understand your concerns, but I do believe that we seriously need to revisit the expiration of the assault weapons and high capacity magazine bans. Rest assured, I will continue to advocate for responsible measures that will reduce and hopefully one day prevent senseless acts of violence, while upholding Second Amendment rights for law-abiding Americans. Once again, thank you for contacting me. As your representative, I both need and value your perspective. Please sign up for my E-Newsletter at my website http://house.gov/susandavis/ if you would like to receive regular updates about what is happening in Congress. With warm regards, SUSAN A. DAVIS Member of Congress

I shared a different collection of images in my other Blog. I try to keep things separated, to make it worth having two separate blogs, as well as to get more people involved and interested in Photography, hopefully they'll find an enjoyment in Fine Art Photography as I do.

It's been a while.  I've been pushing a lot of information and details in to my PC Photo facebook page, and I've been in recent days starting to push more and more information, specifically about the science of photography to my PC Photo blogspot page...  So why am I writing here?  Because I need a journal of thoughts, as far as thoughts that I feel comfortable sharing with the public this is as good a means as any other.

So 3 years in the Navy, well, a little more than that because I only have 11 months until my end of obligated active duty service...  My current plans?  I'm trying to find a job in the civilian sector, something closer to where I grew up near where all of my family is, and something that will pay the bills and provide non-government health care for my family.  TriWest isn't all bad, they take care of the family alright but the medical coverage for the service members and the quality of treatment they receive lacks the same personal attention family members are given.  That is something I AM sick of.

Enough for now, time to go to work.

Controversial News Story

So I've been thinking

"Let me tell ya'll what it's like, bein male, middle class and white. It's a b**** if you don't believe, tune in to my new cd." "No you don't know what it's like, to be kicked, when you're down, to feel like you've been pushed around, to be on the verge of breaking down, and no understands me, well you don't know what it's like, welcome to my life."

Some excerpts from a song that came out, oh, probably ten years ago by this point. I have been looking at scholarships online recently. One that is being offered, actually, several are offering scholarships requiring a video submission. One imparticularly wants the students to focus on a controversial topic that applies to them at their particular school. I was thinking about it...And I think I have one that I'd like to do (if I had the time, or the ability to).

I think I would get fried if it ever got on the news. It might even get thrown out before it even gets to the people who are important enough to make a decision about the award based on the video. My thought was this:

In an effort to equalize the world we've become imbalanced in many aspects. For example.

- Minorities now have more say than majorities, because we're so afraid they won't be listened to that we give them more say than their numbers account for.

- Those of Ethnic backgrounds OTHER than caucasian are treated differently for fear of them being offended by not getting extra attention due to their ethnic background.

- Paying for offenses made to great great great great grandchildren of those who were mistreated. I'm sorry, make a correction, but there's no reason to pay for it for the rest of their lives. If a proper correction was made in the first place than theoretically from that generation on when the correction was made the overall standard of living should be better, if not, is it anothers fault that they didn't do what they could have with what they were given the second time around?

- We have BET, Black Entertainment Television. If I started "WET" it would either be taken off the air for being racist (White Entertainment Television) or it would probably be looked up next to porn in all the yahoo searches, which would give the wrong publicity and therefore can the programming entirely as well as emberass the hosting station.

If I was on television discussing with someone what it's like coming from a middle class perhaps working class family, being caucasian, and male, and even try to mention about how life is hard and how being male, middle or lower-class and white prevents me from the benefits that I would have were I female, upper-class, or of a different ethnic background... Chances are it would stay in the news for a week, about an hour positively and for the next 6 days and 23 hours news anchors around the world would crucify my plight on the 6:00 news and any chance they got to online.

It doesn't matter that I make less than $20,000 a year, and that I have made less than that for the past 8 years consecutively. It doesn't matter that growing up my family went without a vehicle for five years in an area with no public transportation, no nearby grocery stores, and no roads conducive to auto and cycling traffic.

Such is life.

I never did the project, I still might.

One thing stopping me from creating this project is "is it needed", a second thought preventing me is: "Will it do more good than harm."  Until I can answer both of those in the affirmative it remains just a thought of an idea and nothing more.

Post/UVU, Into to Navy Life

Every one has a good reason for what they do, when they do it. Well, you hope they do at least. I suppose that as a general statement particularly in our day and time is a bit too far fetched to hope to be true, though the thought of it being true is nice.

We came to a decision for me to leave school, we being I explained everything as I saw it, she asked what I thought I should do, I expressed to her the routes I saw as options and she confirmed that she would follow me with whatever I felt to be where I needed to be and with whatever I felt I needed to be doing. We went through countless applications with workplaces while I was still in school, for greater than the last year I was in college I was putting in applications with places I thought I would do well in, places I thought would hire me, places I felt I was qualified to work for. Before 9 months had passed I had not received so much as an email with all the applications and resumes I'd submitted. With all my phone calls, online applications, in person applications and email submissions I'd not heard a peep. Over 65 places I'd applied with in 9 months. My degree was solid, my portfolio was balanced and though not the best I'd ever seen it was above average.

Where to go and what to do. My last term in college I unofficially withdrew. I'd discussed options with my Guidance Counselor, College Dept Head and College Dean, none of what they offered was something I could work with, I'd been in school getting jerked around for 4 years to get an associates degree, now they were saying to get a years worth of classes was going to take a minimum of two years IF they worked the classes in right for me but they were suggesting it would be more a 3 to 4 year duration to finish my Bachelors degree. Some terms I would only be allowed to take one course, due to pre-requisites that had been enacted After I'd had my degree route secured. Other terms I would be taking 20 credit hours to get the classes needed to take one or two courses the following term.

This was IF they didn't make any changes (as they were planning to and subsequently Have made) along the way.

What was I to do.

My wife a year or so after we were married was diagnosed with a prolactinoma, finding out about it we found out she wasn't pregnant, recognizing what it was we found out we may not be able to have children at all. We went through the hoops, the blood work, the MRI, the specialist (endocrinologist), all to find out a little pill once a week Might shrink the tumor and Should balance the hormone levels which had gone so far out of alignment some where along the way. With the insurance I had at the time the MRI was $1,200+ out of pocket, another $600 or so was covered by our insurance. Some time thereafter I would leave that job and we'd be paying $450 a month for health insurance that wouldn't cover my wifes medical needs. We had some help with that the entire way, something I didn't ask for but financially couldn't afford to deny accepting.

The long story short is that in 2009 an opening was available in a rating that I had tested well in, the company was the United States Navy, despite having an Associates degree because of the economic collapse in 2007 from the housing market the Department of Defense had become flooded with enlistees and commissioned personnel.  What this meant for me was that had I joined a year earlier I might have been able to join as an Officer, but taking my time I joined as an Enlisted, going to bootcamp as an E3.  I completed bootcamp in Great Lakes, IL., and "crossed the street" to attend my "A" school or "Apprenticeship School" as an Operations Specialist.  Following that I went to Damneck Virginia where I attended the GCCS-m 3.x (Global Command and Control System-Maritime) "C" school and reported shortly thereafter to VTC-11, Tactical Air Control Squadron 11 (also known as TACRON 11).

Shortly after arriving at TACRON 11 I embarked on the USS Decatur, DDG 73 for a 2 week training while they performed their "COMPTUEX", thereafter I embarked the USS Germantown, LSD-42 where myself and a handful of others from my command assisted their "Deck Department" (Where all the Boatswains' Mates and Undesignated Seamen work) in getting their ship ready for a major inspection they had coming up.  INSURV.  Following that joy I came back to my command to discover I'd been swapped out for someone and was now deploying on the USS Boxer the following February 2011, it was August 2010.  Knowing I was now deploying on the USS Boxer LHD-4 vice the USS Makin Island LHD-8 (which I had previously been slated for) I realized my "plans" to adjust to California and begin school were being put on hold indefinitely.

Following a successful 7 month deployment (during the which I injured my knee requiring knee surgery, performed May 18 2012 by LCDR Fraser at Balboa Hospital, San Diego CA) I began school with the Art Institute of Pittsburgh, through their Online Division.  Currently I'm pursuing a Bachelors of Science in Photography through their program, which will take me beyond my current enlistment but will take less time (starting nearly from scratch) with their program than continuing on with UVU would have taken.  Had I not joined the Navy I never would have discovered the Art Institute, I wouldn't be shooting on a 5D MKII and I would be kicking myself for what I wasn't learning at UVU.

Comic Con 2012

Comic Con, where random young women are solicited to solicit other random pedestrians passing by to take "free" samples of Comics, "5 Hour Energy" and various other items, for the sake of self-promotion.

Work or Play?  You decide.

Finishing up the first day

What is he looking at?  There's not even anything set up where he's looking...

Some costumes were better than others, this was not an honorable mention,
rather it's a dishonorable mention.

"Oh man, I have to write this down before my mind is blown any more than it...
...oh, too late, mind blown."

Look familiar?

Wonder Woman 2012?

Starting the kiddies early

Nothing better to use than an unapproachable
Ape to promote your product.

Keeping the peace.  "waddle, waddle, waddle.  Yeah, waddle, waddle, waddle, Yeah!"

Like I'm back in Japan, kind of.

Come here and buy your 10 Cent water or 25 Cent soda for just One Dollar!

Meanderings of a thoughtful mind

I'm often asked what kind of photography I enjoy the most, and then either asked if that's my favorite kind of photography to shoot, why my photography doesn't look like that, or it's just assumed that what I enjoy most from other people's work must be precisely what I enjoy most out of my own.

Oddly, or perhaps not oddly at all, what I most enjoy shooting and what I most enjoy viewing of other peoples work are two completely different types of photography.

There's something that draws me to the kind of photography I enjoy most. There's an artistic balance, despite on occasion there being an archaic colloboration of subject matter, there's a balance through the process and presentation that counters, amplifies, and speaks to the world in it's own very unique way. There may be a use of subject symetry, or chemical/development symetry, some times it's an asymetry of subject that's balanced by a asymetry in the process that proves the balance and delivers the piece to me as a viewer. Yes I have a great appreciation for evenly exposed prints, warm tones, smooth, pristine detail, and perfectly precise exposure and development.

The clutch in my own process though is driven less by my out-product from exposure through development and delivery as much as it's driven by the subtleties in the development and delivery. Small quirks in some processes deliver challenging visual cues in a photograph that are often hard to duplicate, but there's a sudden and permanent rush as one discovers a quirk, recreates it, learns it, and later is able to recreate it and manipulate it at will to create the desired process one desires.

My own meandering process began in my basic photography class in college. In high school I'd worked with a lesser knowledge in the processes of a classical photograph, between my high school photography classes and my yearbook classes (my senior year I was the photography editor and during my time my staff and I won several awards through our publisher in how we developed our yearbook as well as several individuals receiving awards themselves, I was fortunate enough to receive one in photography competing against 27 other schools), my basic photography course in college re-ignited that flame, re-couped to where I was at in high school, then I discovered an aspect in photography I hadn't delved in to before. My instructor though a classical photographer by heart was engaging enough to encourage me to develop and explore my skill in abstract photography and alternative processes, in time I would take more classes and devote more time and energy, and ultimately (what at the time was) a lot of money in to so many art projects I've many times over lost track of them in 4 years majoring in photography.

Other teachers explored printing techniques, some processes were very simple to master, others were very expensive to master. One such technique of the first was Salt Prints. For me they were simple, consistent and one of the easiest alternative forms of printing I've ever experienced. My entire final project one class was in that form, it had 8 images, I used 9 prints to get those 8 images. Sadly a fellow student went through dozens of pages of paper only to be happy with 2-3 images, using the same process. She couldn't discover what she'd done wrong, why the process wouldn't work. It was simple. I had watched as she'd applied her immulsion to the empty paper, it was shoddy at best, had no rythm, and she was inconsistent in her application. Later she didn't let it dry properly, until someone mentioned she really needed to if she wanted it to work properly. Lastly her printing had no consistency, she computed her math for exposure all wrong, not just on her prints but on printing her negatives (we were using digital prints, she provided no contrast screen on her prints which caused them to be dull, combined with underexposing she had very light and dull images) as well. Sadly even her development was all wrong, she kept no timer, gave no consideration for the process ensuing and made the images "develop" in the time frame she dictated rather than dictating her schedule revolve around the time frame the images needed in their development processes.

My happiest time printing was when I had taken notes wrong on a process, completely did the project wrong that we'd been assigned, but in my arrogant pride kept trying to get a print to work I'd been fighting with for days. Ultimately before the project was due I had succeeded with developing a new process in displaying imagery, creating a new medium with which to display photographs, allowing images, lighting and form to combine to create new forms of art in their own category. Oddly, the process allows images to also become sculpture, and when used properly sculpture becomes an additional attribute of the photography rather than photography being on a sculpture as an attribute of the sculpture.

Yes, it's true. There's no small difference in what I like viewing in other peoples work as opposed to what I like creating myself. Ultimately, I'm convinced knowing what kind of photography I enjoy admiring frees me to create my own artwork in other realms of the broad expanse that photography has become. My only admonition to you, is to find out why you like certain artworks, what about them makes them unique to your taste in art, and learn how to define it. I am convinced understanding why you like something allows you to understand more of the innerworkings of your own self, and only by knowing yourself can you appreciate who you are, and who you want to become.

Meandering thoughts

Looking back over the past few years I would expect to have regrets with seeing how things have panned out and being able to visualize how things could have panned out differently. At this moment I can't see or feel out any regrets. Perhaps one would to have dropped out of college a term earlier than I did, then instead of calling it dropping out I could just say "I graduated with my associates and realized I was getting the jerk around from the school and should continue on with another place of education or employment" rather than saying "I graduated and a term afterwards realized I was being jerked around and unofficially withdrew from college because they had an underdeveloped program and wouldn't work with the students in the ways they needed to and didn't have the faculty to properly support the program they were trying to run".

I don't think it's entirely their fault, from the Dean level there are issues in the Art department at UVU, the school dean at the time was an Interim, most interims as I've found have a tendency to not "push" issues, faulty, or students, in any particular direction as they don't have the full "title" or responsibility (and possibly permission) to do so, to top that our department had an Interim dean as well, so the University dean and the College of fine arts Deans were both interims. Not good. Now, after 4 or 5 years without, they've picked up a full-time dean for the College of fine arts. With any luck they'll have two full time faculty members in the photography department in the next ten years and within twenty they'll have a properly developed program. Assuming it grows, and assuming they put the time, money and effort in to it that it requires to have such a program properly develop. Is it challenging? Yes. Would it be worth it? They could blow BYU out of the water, if they only tweaked a few things here and there. If only.

Joining the Navy. It brought no small controversy, not to mention no small amount of dramatic irony, in that someone from Utah (two states inland, as such completely land-locked) would join the Navy. It's been good to me. I've had (aside from "A" school) good LCPO's and LPO's. It's been an enjoyable venture. We've had the opportunity to move to California, I've been treated to Amphib warfare and Amphib life, and I work at a command I really enjoy being at, one that allows me to develop myself and provides an environment where people can excel. I'll soon have the opportunity to deploy, and in under a year and a half I've been to 2 "C" schools and been promoted once. Half of the people in my bootcamp division came in as E1, it's 9 months for them to make E2, then another 9 months to make E3. I came in as an E3, getting paid as an E3, getting proper BAH, and seperation pay. I missed my opportunity the first time around to take the E4 exam by 2 days because of a hiccup in being able to graduate "A" school in time. I made the E4 exam in the fall afterwards though, I did fairly well on the exam and as such advanced (I was hopeful to advance but unsure if I really would have the knowledge base required to do so). Albeit I'm not being paid for the advancement yet, I will be in a couple short months, it's very relieving. I'm ranked enough to start having responsibility, with people looking to me for advice and direction while at the same time being expected to work hard and learn, it's a dynamic environment to be in and to be part of.

Now we're looking at buying a home. We got pre-approved, went searching, fell in love, fell out of love, fell back in love (with a home, or set of homes, using the term "home" loosely as it includes also "condos"), gave up on searching, went back to searching, knelt down and realized the one we'd fallen in love with in the first place was the right one to begin with. Now we've not only put an offer on the table but had it accepted on the first try, no counter-offer or counter-counter-offer, and we're on to the part of securing the official loan and all of the joys it entails. Soon, yes, very soon we'll have our own little private location that will with any luck become an investment into our future, and a place we can begin our family. There are still kinks being worked out in the process, but with any luck it will be shortly secured, and all bumps ironed out.

Will there be speed bumps and detours in our road in the future both near and far? Of course, why wouldn't there be? Are some of them going to blind-side us? Hopefully not terribly, but it wouldn't be the first time we've been blind-sided by something in the 3 years we've been married. On our way to the wedding a deer got onto the road running along side us and bumped it's chest into the car I was driving, a year after we'd been married Erin was diagnosed with a prolactinoma which has been a rollercoaster all of its own with it's own special twists and turns. Is this all part of life and the beauty of living and making decisions and living with consequences? Yes.

Bootcamp updates

The info that is going to get posted are letters that I have gotten from him while at bootcamp. So this is not him posting this but his wife....
November 15
There are a lot of young guys in my division so we are doing IT's which stands for Intensive Training which we are doing about every single day. And that is because the guys in my group are not listening and doing what they are told to do. There is a lot of memorization that we have to do and they keep us busy all day long. Only at night time that there is time to think about home or loved ones. After being at bootcamp for about two weeks i was finally able to attend church. And they gave us a peanut butter shot which made me weak for about 4-5 days. And I was choosen to be the Yeoman for my group.
November 22
I checked the schedule and I graduate January 8th 2010. And on that weekend I have liberty. And then I will be shipped out to a-school a few days after that. We were given a somewhat compliment with our marching and drills which is the first compliment we have gotten ever. I passed my first PFA. 36 people in my group didn't pass it and 16 of them didn't even take it because of dehydration and other reasons. On thanksgiving we get holiday routine which means they can shine shoes or write letters home until 1pm.
November 26
With being a Yeomen for my group I get training on how to do it and I don't feel like they have given me sufficient training for what I am doing. and the little red book that they gave me isn't doing much good either. We did our first personal inspections, dynamic amterial inpsection and our first zone cart inpection and i passed all three the first time. the other guys who didn't pass are retaking it and then if they don't pass it then then they will get set back 2 weeks. I was told by my chief today to eat banana's and yogurt before going running because they give you the energy you need.
November 29
Because of the holidays during my bootcamp that is why we graduate January 8th and not December 30th.
We have lost a lot of people out of our group about 10 people have either been set back or sent home. We have the highest attrition rate out of the 11 groups that got here the same day we did.
December 3/6
There isn't much room to keep stuff here so I will be sending the letters home that I got from you and my family so that we can keep them. If you write letters at night time when you aren't supposed to you can get set back a few weeks. So I don't do it because I don't want that to happen. Being put over seas is easier when you don't have kids and that they give you extra money while over seas since the expenses there a tad bit more there then in the USA. This coming week we have a lot of things coming and a lot of people refer to this week as Hell week. We have the Marlin Spike, we've got a PFA this week followed by our MCA Inspection followed by our Weapson Turn over Inpsection, we have our second test this coming week as well as bunk inspection while we get our Small Arms training. We are also doing live-fire traing/qualification this week.
December 10
I failed my weapons training today so i will need to retake that in a couple of days. I fell asleep during the training session. The flu and pink are going around. so far i have been able tol hold my own. And I passed my 2nd PFA test.
December 17
I finally got my pay stub. The RDC's were supposed to send me a down there a few weeks ago. but I picked them up today. I also got our divisions orders today for most everyone and I looked at mine and A-school is just across the street from where i am at right now. And my A-school is 81 days long. So I should graduate mid april. We did our individual photos today as well as t-shirts for our division.
December 20
So there is TSP plan which is a thrift saving plan which is kind of like a saving account for us. And so i am able to choose how much we put in. So as of right now just 1%.

So during his time gone I have gotten a total of 4 phone calls. The first one was when he first got there and it was about 30 second long. And the next phone call was about 8 minutes long and that is because the guys in his division kept goofing off or messing up so minutes got taken away. And then he got another phone call that was about 40 minutes long which was really nice. And then this last one was on Christmas Eve and that was almost an hour long phone call. but poor him two kids from his group decided to try to get on the computers so that means that most likely they had to do IT that day or this coming week when they are out of holiday mode again. So that is all I have on updates right now. I get to see him January 8th which I can't wait for and neither can he. Hopefully once he can get a computer and stuff he will be able to update this and do a better job at it since he will know more of what he is talking about.

~Wifey

NuSkin issues given to Jeff (SOS liason)

To whom it may concern;

In the course of the past 5 months there have been several “alarms” that have gone off in my head, situations that need to be taken care of due to safety, policy, and awareness. The first may seem like a small issue unless you’re the person it affects.

Not two months ago NuSkin hired a person (woman, can’t remember her name) to go over “workspace ergonomics” which she described (paraphrased) as “changing the workplace to match what the body can do”. Included in that was finding ways to lift boxes so you don’t hit your knees into objects, or twist at the waist. Unfortunately due to the design of the rollers in shipping that lead in to the UPS trucks it’s impossible to lift the boxes (which in my time working there weighed up to 50 pounds) without either twisting at the waist or banging your knees in to the rollers. They need to be higher, probably close to 6 inches higher, and the wheels need to be recessed underneath rather than sticking out so they are no longer a tripping hazard.
Secondly. There is a fan, which now has been fixed after Directly speaking with Cliff (maintenance) about it. It had a short, insulation was coming out of it at the switch and if you touched the top of the switch it would shock you. There are other fans which have insulation coming out of their power cord. Is that not an OSHA worthy issue? Not to mention on the 3 occasions upon which I was shocked neither Danny or Gail sent me up to talk with Jeff (as I was an SOS Associate) to have an incident form filled out. Also, the last time I heard of a person being shocked in the workplace (and it was a small appliance, a blender mind you, lower voltage than the heavy duty fans in shipping) they were made to go get an EKG (I think I’ve heard them also called EEG or perhaps ECG), on the employer. This is due to the electrical shock having the ability even at a low voltage to cause the rhythm of the heart no longer beat as it should, and they have to check for irregularity afterwards. You have insurance to cover for this, to prevent lawsuits if it’s your policy to have such testing be done on employees when they are involved in a workplace incident where they are shocked I suggest you follow it to avoid issues with OSHA as well as the Utah Department of Safety.

Thirdly. While working in packaging (above double check) it’s the work practice that when there are “tw-8 masters” that are empty that you toss them over the side and the person working in “the corner” then picks them up, fills them with tw-8’s, stacks them on a pallet, and either takes them to Picking or stores then on the North end of Double Check. On two occasions while upstairs working in Packaging I had looked over the edge, saw it was clear, let go of boxes and hit another employee on the head with said box as after I let go of the box the employee walked underneath. Danny and Marilou were the two this has happened to, I don’t think an incident report was ever filed with either, and on top of that speaking with some people more experienced in the workplace that it’s most likely a Utah Department of Safety work-hazard that if not corrected could shut that department down. In that same 5 month time period there was another person who’d been hit in the head by a “tw-8 master” though I can’t remember who. Mind you, gravity alone accelerates falling objects at (negating the minimal wind resistance, minimal relating to a falling cardboard box as compared to a falling feather) 9.8 meters a second squared. Many times boxes are Thrown down, with people having the opportunity to walk under at the time when they’re bring thrown. There needs to be a safety net to guide the boxes down and a way to clearly notify the person in the corner that boxes are being sent down to them, thereby eliminating chances for injury that may otherwise needlessly occur.

Fourth. Surveys about what an employee thinks is more important (pay, fellowship in the workplace, safe workplace, a good boss, a job you like, etc) is all fine and well. So are surveys about what you think about your supervisor, what do they do well, what do they need improvement on, what do you like about them, what do you not like about them, what would you change about them. Unless they’re given, received, and read by the supervisor. That creates in the employee an inability to answer truthfully, to have them written, delivered and subsequently read by the supervisor is a liability to say the least. In my own case I felt so uncomfortable with it that I didn’t fill it out or turn it in. I know several co-workers who were made equally uneasy by it, both SOS Associates as well as NuSkin Employees. One way I’ve seen it done is how UVU does it. The teacher explains the survey, then asks for a volunteer who when the teacher leaves will administer the surveys to the class, collect them, and take them to the department secretary. Never at any point does the instructor see the actual paper copies, it’s deciphered, filtered, and completely confidential. An example of what NuSkin may consider doing (as uncomfortable work situations of this sort Can and Should be reported to certain agencies it’s often better to not leave things like this to chance)is to have HR administer the survey while the supervisor is away, process the information, and return with a summary of recommendations based on the information received by the employees. Anyone who sees the surveys from an employee and is their superior of any form (team lead, supervisor, manager, etc.) has the possibility of making a person feel unable to answer truthfully due to possibility of it affecting their employment. I couldn’t say anything about how poorly Gail makes certain decisions and rightly hand the paper directly to her where she would know it was me, let alone hand written where she would read it and recognize my hand writing or speaking style. It’s not good business practice.

Lastly. Some time ago an employee was fired. Though there were other reasons it seemed the main was because she’d slapped (playfully mind you) two other men, one SOS Associate and a NuSkin Employee, Bob (Symph….can’t spell it). Bob has been at NuSkin for 14+ years and to Gail and Danny seems to be something of a mascot. If the reason Kedra Bullock was fired was listed primarily as for slapping those two playfully it should be known that on one occasion Bob pinched her to the point of leaving a half-dollar sized bruise. He did the same with Kaiya while she was working at NuSkin this summer. More recently (Wednesday October 28th) Bob forcefully grabbed Marilou’s wrist in the break room looking for a 8” lunch container he thought would be underneath her 2” wrist. Then he did the same to me. In the real world people get fired for things like that. That’s a liability no employer can afford. At the rate of being there 14+ years he’s not become any form of management either? Not become a team lead or a supervisor? That’s not an investment for NuSkin, that’s complacency that breeds bad work ethic. I’m leaving for Navy Boot Camp Wednesday November 4th. Were I still working there I would have filed a complaint. Marilou is afraid to report this as she’s afraid there’ll be backlash to her if she does where he’s both an Employee and has been at NuSkin for so long. How many times has he crossed the line like this in the past 14 years when in the past 5 months he’s had 4 occasions where Had he been reported any One of them would have had him fired in a different company.

“When men sin by silence when men should protest makes cowards of men.”
~Abraham Lincoln

You need to know and understand what is happening in your workplace in order for it to run smoothly, from how it’s looked (needed repairs not being fixed or reported in 5 months for example, just ask Cliff, the list of repairs needed in Shipping/Double Check/Packaging was a decently long list, And it’s items that had needed to be fixed since before I started in May) I highly doubt the right kind of communication about what’s going on has been happening. Little trainings here and there aren’t what Gail needs, an Associates or better in Business Management would get her started, but she’s not got enough experience to not be considered a liability. In my opinion, that I developed the past 5 months of knowing her.

This document has been posted on my Blog, and handed to two other persons should someone try to reprint/twist what I’ve said.

Dumb Al Gore

Regarding reports on global warming or cooling trends that are being proven in the last 130 years or in some cases the last 11 years.

Studies encompassing less than a minimum of 1,000 years don't hold up in geological court. Geologically we see movement much slower than our small life spans can show, with that we rely on the things we learn from the earth. If you go back over the past 100,000 years of the earth you'd find roughly every 10,000 years there's a cooling trend followed by a heating trend, which oddly is followed by a cooling trend. Oddly enough that's been going on since the earths creation. Go figure, you'd almost think the earth was doing just exactly what it was supposed to be doing...

Yay for Chinese Effeciency,

My delivery wasn't expected until Wednesday (placed the order last tuesday, said it'd take 5-7 days to process the order, not to mention build it, and ship it...) CN is China. At the bottom is the start of it's trip, it isn't scheduled to get here until Wednesday, but looks like my custom ZuneHD is gonna get here Monday!!!! :)

TriStar would still be looking at the order and seeing if they wanted the money from another job..... ROFLMAO!

Oct 19, 2009 12:35 AM
At dest sort facility
SALT LAKE CITY, UT

Oct 18, 2009 8:58 PM
At local FedEx facility
SALT LAKE CITY, UT

Oct 18, 2009 4:25 PM
Departed FedEx location
MEMPHIS, TN

Oct 18, 2009 5:31 AM
Arrived at FedEx location
MEMPHIS, TN

Oct 17, 2009 8:38 PM
Departed FedEx location
ANCHORAGE, AK

Oct 17, 2009 8:45 PM
Int'l shipment release
ANCHORAGE, AK

Oct 17, 2009 11:45 AM
Arrived at FedEx location
ANCHORAGE, AK

Oct 17, 2009 4:14 AM
Departed FedEx location
GUANGZHOU CN

Oct 16, 2009 11:21 PM
Departed FedEx location
GUANGZHOU CN

Oct 16, 2009 5:51 PM
Left FedEx origin facility
ZHUHAI CN

Oct 16, 2009 5:49 PM
Picked up
ZHUHAI CN

mmmmm, greasy

So saturday I didn't have any plans really, I got up with my wife, took her to work, came home, fell asleep in the chair I'm in right now then when I woke up the sun was working on creeping over the mountains peeking into the valley and I went for a 3 mile run. I got home from that, helped my mom-in-law by helping my dad-in-law move a large tub from just outside the stable in the back into the back of the suburban then helped move a several-hundred-pound-bench over so it was by a stable wall 30 feet away from where it was sitting... dad-in-law couldn't lift one end by himself so he refused that I move it by myself though I was moving it just fine by lifting one end, rotating that end to being further over and repeating the process. So, he intervened, so we lifted an end together (really it felt to me like I was lifting the same as before so I'm not sure how much he was helping but it made him feel better so whatever...) then began again the process I'd previously started...but under his direction.

By the time we'd finished with that it was nearly 11, I still needed to shower then I was going to try to play catch (with a football) with one of my niece's who'd asked me to a few days prior before catching G.I. Joe with a nephew (wifey was working so I could go to a movie she was apprehensive about going to previously....) and the movie turned out to be much more awesome and impressive than I'd been expecting, I was very happy with it and can't wait to buy it on BluRay as I expect nothing less than complete awesomeness from it... :)

During the movie I missed two phone calls, I checked the voicemails when I got out, one was my wife letting me know they were going to have her work two more extra hours beyond the 8 extra that she was working that day, the other voice mail was my nephews mother asking me to help fix her car when I got back, the universal belt had died on her minivan and needed replacing. Well, when I got there I realized it hadn't died but it had shredded half way through and had also slipped off the pullies. Within two minutes of being there my sister-in-law told me that she was taking my car to pick up her daughter (who was at tennis practice and I had passed by where she was when I was on my way over to their place coming back from the movie) and that she'd buy a new universal belt on the way back. She came back (still not having asked to use my car) with the windows down and locked the doors but left the windows down and kept MY keys! (mind you there's a several-hundred-dollar CD player in the car with a USB Jump drive attached to it with 9 gigs of my music on it, not to mention a not-cheap mp3 player in the center console as well as other items like a Flip recorder, my indestructible point and shoot camera and some other items I'd like to not lose at a thiefs whim)..... I didn't know she'd left the windows down as I was laying under her minivan trying to figure out the configuration of how the belt goes on the pulleys with the old-broken belt.

5 months ago I replaced the positive power wire (which had been roughly attached when it had broken nearly 6 months prior but had completely been forgotten about) and we'd searched high and low for where the starter motor was so I wouldn't have to trace the power wire all the way through the engine compartment.... We couldn't find it though so I ended up having to cut through 8 feet of wire wrapping to open up where the power wire was (bundled up with more than a dozen other wires courtesy of Plymouth thereby making it impossible to trace without cutting open the wrapping no less than every six inches). After I found how to put the belt on, assuming there was only one configuration that would leave little to no slack in the line, but without knowing how to create enough slack in the line to actually put the belt on the pulleys it was impossible to complete the job. Total time at this point was 3 hours. The previous time working on the power wire took 8 hours because of having to find for myself exactly how everything went...and jump starting the car because the battery had died... not to mention I did this in the dark, though the sun was still out the whole time I was working on it most recently, Very, VERrrrry fortunately.

So this time I start to send my sister-in-law out to pick up a Chilton's manual for the minivan so that I can have the mechanics-advice I need without going to a mechanic and paying to get it done... While she starts looking (including trying to call her husband who's out in Georgia at the moment) my wife calls asking me to pick her up (I still haven't remotely finished with the universal belt, nor have I gotten my keys back though they'd been back on the premises for 45 minutes at this point) so I told her to call our sister-in-law to pick her up in Our car (when she picked my wife up she didn't relinquish the drivers seat to my wife which ticked us both off that much more....). Just before she left to pick my wife up though she found the manual her husband had bought for the 98 plymouth minivan some 8-9 years prior, low and behold it's the very brand I was hoping for, Chilton. So within minutes of looking in it I've located the diagram for the universal belt on the pulleys and confirmed they're to be in the same configuration I had deduced while under the van (remember I couldn't just look at it when I first got there to find out how it was done because the belt had fully fallen off...) and the only pulley that could possibly have a pivot (which I'd gone as far to trying to move as putting a rod against it and pushing until I was lifting myself off the ground...) was the very same pulley that's supposed to pivot, clockwise (like I'd deduced) only they said to "turn it clockwise to release dynamic tension".

To me a statement like "turn pulley clockwise to release dynamic tension" means spin the blasted thing to the right and it'll open up the tension so you can put the belt on... No, turns out it means get a wrench on the bolt (like I thought we were going to have to do but I don't know where tools are at their place and I haven't had tools in my car for a year and a half now...) and pull it toward the bumper as hard as you can while someone not physically strained from holding the dynamic tension back puts the belt in to place... This is where you find out it Does matter which pulley gets the belt on it last as some Rrrrrreallllllllllllllyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy don't want to get it last, but a few tries (12 or 20 is more like it) later we've got the belt on, moments before we get the belt on though my sister-in-law says to me and her son (that I'd gone to the movie with earlier, he's been helping me this whole time) that we should just stop and she'll take it in to a mechanic on monday... (next time tell me "hey the van broke can you pick up my daughter and I'll get the van fixed monday...? lol) but we got it finished, she started up the engine and it didn't even slip off! I just had black arms. from fingernail to beyond my elbows was literally black on almost every square inch.......... Apparently (as I found out while i was under there) they're burning oil, leaking oil, leaking anti-freeze and haven't had an undercarriage wash in Years, their spacing is off on their spark plugs so oil is leaking out of those sockets and overall they need a tune-up on their van.

But we got it done

I didn't swear

And my nephew got a chance to learn how to fix a car, and realized why he doesn't want a vehicle that has no space to manuever his hands in while working on them... All in all a good 3.5 hours spent. :)

plus we got a full tank of gas, dinner, and a loaf of banana chocolate-chip bread, which combined to all equalize the other issues faced while trying to fix the blasted thing, lol.

So when you hear your vehicle have a slapping sound coming from the engine of your car, pull over immediately, cut the shredded parts off, and MEMORIZE how the belt goes over the pulleys, go to the nearest auto parts store and buy the best belt you can for your vehicle (the better you get the less likely you'll replace it again soon) and if you don't have a Chilton manual for your vehicle pick it up while you're at the parts store... Haynes will do too but Chilton seems to do a better and more in-depth job of taking your car apart and putting it back together... Then go home and use a wrench and loosen the line, remove the old belt, put the new one, and if you do it the right way with the right instructions and don't have to wait for parts to arrive or a spare hand then it should only take 20-30 minutes, including wash up... fun fun fun!

Advice for Navy Recruits pre-bootcamp

Get to the front of the line when you get off the bus. Getting there last and being on P-hold because your division isnt full sucks. Big time.

When they tell you to take your debit card, money and ID out of your wallet and put it in your sock - KEEP the wallet. its ok. especially if your voided check (for pay) is in it. Just put the wallet in the sock.

Make sure your shoes fit. Dont just deal with it if they dont fit right. You'll regret it.

Try to get a leadership role. Theres a lot, even just a section leader - And excel at it. It helps stand out in a good way.

BE QUIET! talking about anything ill get you IT
Actually... Ballard said it best. Do what your told and dont talk and you'll do fine. He's right.

Dont go to the Dr unless you have to. you miss a lot each time and too many times you could get set back. But dont not go if you're really sick. Go. just use it wisely.

Run 1.5mils w/o stopping NO - before you get to bc. DONT WALK. Actually get used to running 20 mins w/o stopping too. trust me.

Learn to march now. Seriously.

Get used to drinking at least 8 liters of water a day. Now. The more the better.

The food is surprisingly good. Its easy to over eat. Once your out of P-days dont let yourself overeat. No one wants to see it later.

Showers/toilet are community. get used to it.

Be Positive.

Dont take things too personally. Even if you're yelled at for something you didnt do. One team, one fight.
SLEEP. ok fine... sneak writing a quick 30min letter then SLEEP. Sleep Sleep SLEEP. dont stay up all night chatting with the guys.
Practice shaving in 2mins or less
Practice standing absolutely still now... for at least an hour
Dont lock your knees.
Stop talking ith your hands NOW
I know the training guide is big and boring but for the love of everything you value STUDY it.

DAR dar dar dar

A DAR is a form used to process a DEPper (a person in the Delayed Entry Program) from their current rate and ship date in to either an earlier ship date or an earlier ship date with a different rating. They come in very handy as many people in 2009 are finding themselves entering the armed forces and not going to Bootcamp right away but being able to get in under the banner of a position they don't want to hold, the DAR allows them to hopefully escape that before their first ship date approaches.

I found myself in the same shoes. Starting the process of going to MEPS (Military Entrance Processing Station) Salt Lake (West Valley really....) back in March of 2009 I found that though my recruiter found me to be within weight range the doc's there didn't. It was May before I was able to go back up but when I Was able to be there again at the start of May I was found to be within tolerance to join the Navy, not necessarily the body fat percent required by the time I left bootcamp, but good enough to join. I was able to join that day, due to an influx of people trying to enter that day I was left entering a job field I didn't want and later than I really wanted, scheduled to enter RTC (Recruit Training Center, aka bootcamp) and was scheduled to leave in March 2010.

I applied my DAR with one recruiter, the paper work stayed on the desk, not to be completed but passed on to another. It seemed to take months, though days were only passing while I waited for something to be done. We realized there was other paperwork that could be done that would allow for the hopeful ensurance of a security clearance. Well, the paperwork was done but it still felt like everything was taking forever. By the time June had come and past I was beginning to lose hope in being sent out as anything other than Corpsman. Before August was ended it would seem that despite two chances of being shipped out luck was not to be in my favor and the waiting process remained, though by now there was time that my paperwork had been rushed through, my DAR had been processed, and if there were openings I would have had one.

Finally it seemed there was hope, after the Chief Selects (Petty Officer First Class's that were selected to be ranked up to Chief Petty Officer) had their pinning ceremony in Denver (for the local region) the current Chiefs serving at MEPS (who had all gone for part of the process of the Chief Selects process of ranking up) all came back on Thursday just last week, though they didn't go back to work until the next day. Oddly enough that was when I got my phone call. Four phone calls to be precise. Operations Specialist leaving November 4th.

The real point of the post....

I went to the temple that night with my wife as we'd planned to do that day, we went and as we entered my wife asked me if we should do Sealings, we'd not done it for a while and it also just Felt right, so we did. We proceded through the sealings, there was quite a group, 5 couples in a small room, we'd been one of two or three groups that actually had to wait before there was an availability to perform the sealings as there'd been a large amount of people who went to the temple that night. While others were performing ordinances my thoughts began to process all that had gone on in the prior months, all that I'd hoped to have happen, and all that would transpire.

It occured to me while I was sitting there, that those on the other side to some degree are very much in the same state that I was in from March through just this past week. Waiting for paperwork to process, hoping to have it done before the end of the week, hoping to receive their phone call, and hoping that their recruiters were still doing their work (in this case the recruiters are you and I, performing ancestral work in all its forms as well as vicarious work for those who've passed on before us) so far away from where they were, praying to not be forgotten.

moldable

To be like a potters clay.

Have you ever worked with it? Felt it's stickiness holding to the creases in your skin, it's pliableness is there though it fights to some degree with rigidity as you mold a handle, or decorative piece for a side of a pot or dish. It resists in order to keep structure and it's ability to keep shape when formed allows it to become the finished product that is so desired by the sculptor.

The trick.

A potters wheel turns blindingly fast. Have you ever ridden on a merri-go-round? Most parks have had them removed long years past, but riding on them gives a sense of thrill and delight to the point of losing your breakfast as you spin controllably uncontrolled in a concentric circle, with bars to hold on to you can keep your form but at the same time the world feels as though it's spinning wildly out of control.

In order for the clay to be formed in to the desired shape it must first be spun wildly, although the clay thinks the world is spinning around it out of control and blindingly fast in the hands of the potter the clay moves slowly comparative and is easily molded, trimming up the sides shaping the odd shaped blob transfiguring it from it's earthly form and in to a shape more comely, refined, and cleansed. The process continues as the desired shape takes form, soon the process of trimming unwanted deformities or over thicknesses will ensue bringing with it a slightly slower pace betimes, then speeding back up and entering the process of smoothing, an abrasive (water) is applied to perfect both the outside and inside of the form, allowing for it to be fully removed of impurities so as to be prepared to dried, then dry fired, then to have a glaze applied to ultiumately reveal it's new found completeness.

If you should ever find yourself spinning wildly out of control just stop and think and ponder about which step in the process in your life you're at, and maybe it'll allow you to take a step back and observe yourself like the potter in your own process to the kiln.

Interestingly boring paradox, simplly complex.

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylc=X3oDMTB2Y2t1c212BF9TAzIxMTUzMDA5ODgEc2VjA2ZwBHNsawN0b2RheXE-?qid=20090625164520AAgNZ4A

is where I found this, here is the paradox, below it is my response and below that is the response of the person who was chosen as the "best" answer so far as the person asking the question is concerned.

The Paradox: There is a village where the barber shaves all those and only those who do not shave themselves. Who shaves the barber?

My answer. Given the answer below I must say that One (of seemingly few) answer to this would be that the barber must have his body shave him however someone else must control the movements of his body so that in some sense it was someone else shaving him and in some other sense he was the only person who was allowed to shave those who couldn't shave themselves while still not shaving those who could. Because it would be someone elses motions in shaving him it wouldn't be his motions shaving him but because it was his hand and He Could shave it was therefore possible for someone else to use Their muscles to control His body while he involuntarily was shaved by his own self, ish. So, does it give a perfect solution? No, but in my opinion it isn't something worth making a paradox over, if a barber only shaved the people who didn't shave themselves (as opposed to couldn't) it would make it real-life as such no one would have Ever asked such a redundantly moronic question. Yes, I hope someone with a thesis who Wrote his/her thesis on this paradox reads this and is offended! =)


The response chosen on that particular site.

OK. take a deep breath and read this slowly, because it is very tricky. First two definitions:

def 1) All and only those who shave themselves = S

def 2) All people in the village, including the barber, are either members of S or members of not-S. there is no one in the village that is a member of both.

If the barber shaved himself then he would be a member of S.
If the barber does not shave himself then he would be a member of not-S.

A barber who must shave all and only not-S can not shave any S

The barber can not shave himself, because he would be shaving a member of S

if the barber is not a self shaver then he is a member of not-S

The barber must shave himself because he must shave all members of not-S

Thus he must both shave and not shave himself

This is the paradox.

No one else in the village can shave the barber because only the barber can shave members of not-S.

This is a variation of Russel's paradox, and there are several ways to solve, or attempts, to solve this depending on how it is interpreted. I'm not even going to attempt a solution here. Someone could, and probably has, written a doctoral thesis on the subject.

laws of physics: the ever changing?

From a senior level Chrysler person: Monday morning I attended a breakfast meeting where the speaker/guest was David E. Cole, Chairman of the Center for Automotive Research (CAR), an Engineer with 40+ years automotive experience, full Professor at the Univ. of Michigan. You have all likely heard CAR quoted, or referred to in the auto industry news lately. Mr. Cole told many stories of the difficulty of working with the folks that the Obama administration has sent to save the auto industry. There have been many meetings where this very experienced automotive expert has had to listen to a newcomer to the industry; someone with zero manufacturing experience, zero auto industry experience, zero business experience, zero finance experience, zero engineering experience, and apparently zero brains tell them how to run their business. Mr. Cole's favorite story is as follows: There was a team of Obama people speaking to Mr. Cole. They were explaining to Mr. Cole that the auto companies needed to make a car that was electric and liquid natural gas (LNG) with enough combined fuel to go 500 miles, so we wouldn't "need" so many gas stations (A whole other topic). They were quoting BTU's of LNG and battery life they had looked up on some website. Mr. Cole explained that to do this you would need a trunk FULL of batteries, and a LNG tank as big as a car to make that happen. And that there were problems related to the laws of physics that prevented them from... The Obama person interrupted and said (and I am quoting here), "These laws of physics? Whose rules are those? We need to change that (while others wrote down the name of the law so they could look it up). We have the Congress, and the administration. We can repeal that law, amend it, or use an executive order to get rid of that problem. That's why we are here, to fix these sort of issues."

Eggless Eggrolls

Confucious
Chicken
Egg Rolls
12 Count

here's the kicker

Wal-mart.

And they actually taste really good.

Egg Roll Filling: Cabbage, Chicken, Carrot, celery, onion, seasonings [soy flour, sugar, salt, dextrin, autolyzed yeast extract, hydrolyzed soy protein, dextrose, sesame oil, spice, soybean oil, sherry wine powder [(maltodextrin, sherry wine solids, sulfur dioxide), corn syrup solids], garlic powder, chicken flavor, fermented soybeans, wheat, lemon powder, mushroom powder, ginger, disodium inosinate and disodium guanylate]. NO MSG ADDED - except for the small amount found naturally occuring in autolyzed yeast extract.

Crust: Enriched flour (wheat flour, niacin, reduced iron, thiamine mononitrate, riboflavin, folic acid), water, salt, corn starch, potato starch, vinegar, soy lecithin, less than 0.1% sodium benzoate as preservative.

Fried in Vegetable oil.

I think certain people with allergies to eggs might just find they enjoy the egg rolls. ;)

Honest Paul

Stories within stories, wrapped around an idea in my head, and joys of memories and personal growths over the years.

I was working asphalt when I was given the nickname "honest paul". strike that, it was 7th grade P.E., I can recall being called that by my coach/instructor as he was asking if we'd done our stretches and push-ups/sit-ups, the kid who was supposed to get us doing it came out maybe a minute before the coach came out and got us into position. Coach came out and asked us if we'd stretched, etc., and everyone said yes except me. I said no, we hadn't. Needless to say he wasn't happy with everyone else, they weren't happy with me, but I was able to sleept that night.

Some years later, post high school and my second season into asphalt repair my foreman told me to tell the owner if asked that we had gassed up the night before and that we were already on the road to the job site. As we'd just pulled up I was gassing up while he went in to the gas station to grab some food, a drink, etc. The owner called, and I told him the truth, the foreman had asked me to lie and we hadn't done anything like we'd been instructed to and were more than an hour behind the schedule he thought we were on, which is the schedule our day was planned out with. Again I was called "Honest Paul" by the foreman with more than a hint of disdain during the remainder of my time with that company.

Can I lie? Yes, do I try not to? Yes. Especially when my honor is at stake.

"When men sin in silence when men should protest makes cowards of men." ~Abraham Lincoln

As a teen I was found to be both obnoxious and hot headed. Well, I'm still a little of both, but by and large there's dramatic improvement from my personal starting point, I say this from word of others, I'm still not happy with myself 100% but I know I'm closer than I've ever been in my adult life. My behavior drove people away. I thought it was because they didn't like Me, but the definition of a person goes beyond who they are and in to how they respond, and how they communicate (both transmitting and receiving).

It turned out I wasn't communicating what I really wanted to communicate. I would lash out, over react, and be furious over the dumbest things. I knew I wasn't happy but couldn't quite figure out why or how to change it. Perhaps I'm a tough love kind of guy, but I seem to recall mom saying to me that people didn't Want to be around me because of how I responded, because of how upset I would get, how I would respond, and that yes over all I was a good person but (this is my own metaphor following) even chocolate covered in enough cockroaches would drive Any person away. She was honest. Brutally and totally honest. Did it hurt? Yes. Absolutely. Was she right? Well, mothers aren't always right (No imperfect person is) but this time she hit the nail on the head, and it felt like it was hit by a sledge hammer. It hurt. Partly because how blunt she was about it, and more so because she was right, and there was no ifs ands or buts about it, she was right and the only way I could make things different would be if I changed. I had to change because I wanted to, because I had a drive a motivation leading me on to become something I wanted to see in the mirror, because I wanted to be able to fall asleep peacefully at night without quams or thoughts running through my head of what I'd done wrong and how to fix it, as with all things that aren't broken, if it ain't broken it don't need no fixin'. Yes, grammar issues intentional, and for your enjoyment, cause some times it's just more fun to say things the fun way.

Did I change? Well, I still am. It's an ongoing process, it always is and always will be until I don't have to think about it any more and it's just natural to respond in a calm collected manner when naturally I may want to scream and shout. It took someone being bitingly blunt, and my willingness to not only ask for help from those around me, but to accept that help as well and internalize the reality of fixing a real problem was my sole responsibility, and I was the one who would be accountable when all was said and done.